Urge to kill... rising.....

So today I took a nice trip to see my lady doctor. I will call her my lady doctor because the word "gynocologist" just doesn't sound as nice. Anyhoo, I was getting weighed, and the nice nurse wrote down my weight.

128 lbs.

GOSHDAMMIT I hate the scales at doctors offices!! They always add another 5lbs to what I think I weigh! See this morning, I left all happy because woo! I was 123lbs. Even the Wii Fit said so, so it must be true, right? Well who am I supposed to believe!? The doctor's office scale, or Nintendo?!

I suppose I should count my blessings that I am still in the 120 range with those damned doctor's office monstrosities... maybe they just add the 5lbs as a conspiracy. Wouldn't that be awful?? Imagine all of those girls with eating disorders who suddenly see an extra 5lbs. I mean shit, if it makes me panic, I can't imagine what it would do to one of those girls.

So I go to Shoppers to get my prescription and a few groceries, and wouldn't you know it, this sweet-faced Latino guy working at Wachovia tries to get me to sign up for a new account. Sorry, I can't, already have two; personal and small business (one for me, one for Blood Corps), so no more bank accounts. He was like, "band? Really? I play guitar..." and the rest of the conversation was him asking about Blood Corps. He was really sweet, but I could tell that this conversation started off as:

- She's Latina. Lemme go speak Spanish.

Because he literally asked me if I spoke Spanish, my ethnicity, ect. It's a common subject. I wonder if white people do this? "Hey Billy, where you from?" "Nebraska." "No, I mean, FROM from?" "The fuck should I know??"

I don't know, I've had that since I was little and it always kinda irks me. I can only say "My mom is from Spain and my dad is Salvadorian" so many times before I wanna scream, "I'm brown and my parents speak Spanish!!" and get it over with. It's cute how Salvadorians can TELL I am Salvadorian, but when I say I'm half Spanish they're like "Ohhh I understand..." because.. I don't know. What about my face says "Salvadorian"? Or maybe it's the fact that I'm so short. I know my nose is pretty Spanish.. all long and.. I don't even know. I get asked this question so often I can't help but analyze it every single time.

Racism within your own race?

How ridiculous is this?

Click here to read the article.

That black people are racist against one another is the most ridiculous and awe inspiring thing that I've ever heard. Next thing you know, Latinos are going to be pissed because my nose is European.

I remember my dad telling me that, as a kid in El Salvador, he was teased by a woman in town. My dad's really dark, definately deep-rooted with Native American blood, with solid black hair and black eyes. This lady used to tease him because his brother was lighter skinned, more my complexion. I'm lighter because I'm half White. Half Spanish White. Half blonde hair/green eyes White. My brother and sister both have white kids, with blonde hair and blue eyes.

I swear to God, this stuff weirds me out. How the hell can you discriminate against people who's discrimination you share?? Isn't the world harsh enough on people? Why should we add to it? It makes no goshdamn sense.