What your music taste says about you on a date...

A friend of mine posted a silly list from a silly website about what your music taste says about you on a date that was written in 2011. The artists are still pretty current, so it being two years old doesn't mean much. I won't make you click on the link, so here's a few key quotes:

Rihanna: You’re hot.
Judas Priest: At some point in your life, you’ve sniffed a little glue.
Nicki Minaj: You’re awesome. 

If you look like this, you might be a "straight", and I
probably fear you.

Ahahahaha!! Okay, lets stop right there. First of all, I understand that this is on a silly little website marketed toward normal people, a group I refer to as "the straights". The straights are people who I usually don't (and try not to) associate with because we don't get along. Not for lack of trying, mind you! I've got a few things in common with normal people; sports, for example. I read the sports page and I'm on Deadspin often enough to know what's what in the world of sports. I'm no expert, but for the most part, I can take part in a conversation on the Redskins. I admit though, I am way more versed in the Capitals and hockey, but hey, hockey is becoming an everyman's sport so there ya go! If I need to talk to a normal folk, we'll talk about sports. Or news. I know what's going on in the world because I enjoy listening to NPR and reading the newspaper. I am by no means an awkward nerd.

All of this being said, music is where I get weird, because music is where my heart is. Specifically, my heart is in a kind of music that most straights either know nothing about or are afraid of, so this is where we have some disagreements. My husband, thankfully, doesn't make me sick with his music choices. Sure, he and I have some disagreements when it comes to King Diamond, but I can respect that. Some people just don't get King Diamond. I was once one of them. I get it. What I don't get is the mindset people have when they choose to listen to things like Rihanna and Nicki Minaj. 

Zakk Wylde, the sexiest and manliest of men.

Now don't get me wrong, I'm not judging people who like this kind of music. I just don't understand it. I mean, I kind of understand it. People like catchy music. Okay, I get that. But in my head, this music isn't catchy. It's grating. I'm sure people think the same way I do when it comes to heavy metal, which is why I think, deep down, this is why I just can't get involved too deeply with "the straights". Somewhere in our brains, we are wired differently. Some people will hear a Miley Cyrus song and think, "wow, that's awesome, I'm gonna buy that!" and I'll hear it and think, "this is really boring". That isn't to say that all metal fans agree on everything, either. We can be some of the pickiest SOBs in the world and we fight over the dumbest shit. Being classified as a metal band doesn't necessarily mean I'm gonna enjoy the music, and I'll be the first to tell you how much I loathe most bands that have -core at the end of their description.

But I digress. This list was interesting to me because I can see this as how the normal world views us. I listen to Judas Priest, so there's probably something wrong with me. Well, in my vision, the world is the opposite. I see people who listen to Britney Spears and wonder what's wrong with them. We walk along these separate paths and meet in the middle to discuss beer and hockey, but it's times like these I'm glad I don't date, because I can't imagine what it would be like to meet a handsome man and discover he's into Miley Cyrus. Of course, my definition of "handsome" includes long hair and a beard, so, that probably wouldn't happen... but if it did, I might be devastated.

I don't want to write down my own judgmental list of  ways in which I look down on others. I understand that saying "You listen to Kanye West? EW GROSS!" would make me look kinda bitchy. So instead, I'll write down a list of my real-life reactions to people's musical taste. Here goes!

Miley Cyrus: ..really? Even with the.. huh. Okay. Well.. okay.
Judas Priest: Which era? Can we be friends forever?
Nikki  Minaj: I like her pants?
Black Sabbath: Which era? 
Adele: She's very talented!
X Japan: I love you. Lets sing Kurenai together and lament the death of hide almost as dramatically as Yoshiki.
Lady Gaga: Whatever you wanna do, man.
Metallica: You mean now?
John Mayer: Who?
Iron Maiden: Lets frolic TO THE HILLS together!
Beyonce: You mean on your own time?
Dio: Sorry, but I'm already married.
One Direction: Who?
Maroon 5: Who?
Imagine Dragons: Did you say Dragonforce?? No? Oh. Who?
Dragonforce: Lets be friends forever! Do you play D & D?