Friday, September 21, 2012

Reverse psychology!!

I'm one of those silly people who thrives on reverse psychology. If you tell me I can't do something, I'll work hard to do it, just because I want to SHOVE IT IN YOUR STOOPID FACE.

Background story:

I was asked to do a guest vocal appearance during an upcoming show with a band who goes on after us. The band is certainly not our style (modern radio rock), but, when someone asks me to sing with them, I consider it a compliment. That they actually want to hear me do something for them because they think I can and they think it would be entertaining makes me happy! Why would I say no? So of course I said yes. I listened to the song and thought, "okay, not what I usually do, but still doable". I listened a few more times, got the lyrics, and began studying.

I forwarded the song to a friend of mine, who responded by saying that the song "isn't in your style", "is really high", and "I would say no".


Oh no you didn't. People, I am not one of those vocalists who is pinched into a tiny corner because of "style". You're talking about someone who learned to sing by mimicking. I didn't take voice lessons at a young age. Here are the steps I take when learning a song:

1. Get the song
2. Get the lyrics
3. Listen to the song
4. Sing along
5. Repeat steps 3-4 until it's perfect

That's how I roll. It can be any style. I've done this with motown, I've done this with metal, I've done this with Broadway, and I've done this with opera. The song I'm going to be guest-vocalizing on is radio rock. You think I can't do radio rock, you've got another thing coming. Am I gonna do it exactly like the other person did it? No, because I'm not a robot. Am I gonna do it well? You're damn right I am. It might be fueled by the fact that someone didn't believe in me, because as usual, I got somethin' to prove, and that something is that I AM ONE BAD ASS MOTHER $%&ER. That's right people, I am the Shaft of female fronted heavy metal. I come, I conquer, I tear #$&* up and leave the ladies (and gentlemen) begging for more. Bitches. Because if nobody's gonna back me up then I gotta be the one to do it. Because if there's one thing I know for certain, it's how to sing. It's the one thing I know I can do better than anything else, so please, do not test me. Do not try to tell me something is "too high" or, "not in my style" because bitch, I will make it my style. I will make it my ho. I will smack that song around until people say "daaaaaaayum".

Now. If you will excuse me, I'm gonna go listen to the song another ten thousand times.


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