Friday, December 7, 2012

A confession in the name of rock..

Alright people, brace yourselves. What I'm about to tell you is pretty insane. I, your resident Queen of Hell, your party-going binge-drinking metal-loving card-carying mosh-pit enthusiast... do not like "rock n' roll".

Try not to pee yourself. I shall explain.

I'm not sure how it happened, but during my formulative years I wasn't really exposed to rock. Metal? a little. I found that I was drawn to musicals, which makes sense, because all my parents let me watch were Disney movies. My neighborhood was decidedly more into hip hop, and my parents wouldn't let me listen to it. Nor was I allowed to listen to Madonna, who would have been a terrible example anyway (thanks, mom and dad!). You all know this story. I grew up sheltered. But even when I got to high school, and even as I tried my best to like the popular music, none of it stuck. I didn't FEEL anything. I listened to DC101 and 98Rock and gave Nirvana and Creed and Hole and Garbage and whoever else was famous at the time a genuine try. Nothin'. It didn't hit me in the heart.

I discovered metal just a bit after, but only because X Japan made me realize why I liked them; it wasn't the ballads, or the genuine emotional blah blah blah, it was their few (very few) truly HEAVY METAL songs that I wanted and craved. I needed more of THAT, I decided. And here we are today.

So even now, as I listen to a swingin' rock n' roll beat, a nice guitar, something uplifting and happy and party-rockin', I am dead inside. Like a petrified corpse. It just doesn't hit me, and in a way, that makes me kind of sad. Everyone loves rock n' roll, right? Instead, I feel like the chick at the end of the movie version of Christine. As she sees the smoking cube of what used to be a murderous mass of metal, and a dude walks by with a boom box playing classic rock.

"I hate rock n' roll."

I feel you, sister. Though, admittedly, for much different reasons.

How is it possible to hate rock and absolutely love metal? I really have no idea. There's a really fine line between the two, after all. Some of Priest's more uh.. sparkly stuff could easily be considered rock, but I still like it kinda. I enjoy listening to AC/DC. That's rock, right? But man, that swinging happy "hard rock" on the radio about doin' people and partying or crying about your boyfriend or whatever.. it just does not click with me. Even when Hammerfall sings songs about cheating on their girlfriend and getting caught (I shit you not) it typically doesn't vibe well with me. Real-world situations and relatable content? Not to me, it isn't.

I don't know, maybe I'm just weird. But, if you should happen to see me cringe once someone turns on the "latest hits" on the radio, now you know why.

1 comment:

Jeff said...

The reason I embraced the Ramones and the Sex Pistols (along with most of the seminal punk movement) was the fact that I found arena rock (aka "rock'n'roll") to be sleep-inducingly boring. That led to discovering Motorhead, which let me have a more open mind and "get" Pantera, Rigor Mortis, Down, Anthrax, etc., most of which are a lot closer to the punk sensibility than any of that arena crap.