Well the truth is, I am feeling a lot better. As of last week (when I traveled to Minnesota), I realized that honestly, things could be worse. As it is, at least I have a job. Is it the job I want? No, but hell, my dream job is to be a musician, so none of my past jobs have really been my dream job. I'm learning to lighten up. Life is too short for me to be obsessed with what I feel like is my own failure.
In perfect honesty, I do not hate my job at the greenhouse. Are there times when I am desperate to come home? Sure, but what job doesn't do that to people? Work is work, and as far as jobs go, this is not the worst thing that I could be doing. At the very least, I work with people who are kind and courteous. I have never had an issue with my coworkers. They are all very humble people who are very down-to-earth, and I respect them all. It's hard to come across that sort of thing in an office environment, where most of the people around you are competing. Not that I don't miss that of course... but this is only one chapter in my life. I mean hell, I've had four jobs since graduating. I know I'll have more, and I know that I can rebuild myself.
For now, I'm focusing on this one. I'm still working on the design stuff, but my main focus is on my music, my upcoming wedding, and the artistic inspiration that I've been salvaging.
As for other creative outlets? I'm in a podcast! Sako, my photographer, maid of honor, and the Daimyo of Dork, had the idea to create a podcast. It's called "The Duchy of Dork" and it stars the both of us. I'm really impressed by all of the work she's done on the sites, and her photos are absolutely beautiful (not just because they're of me... *cough*).
So go check it out, sometime! If you have time to kill to listen to two chicks talk about dorky stuff, that is.